What made you stop being an addict?

I so badly wanted to f*uk a girl, yet I was so shy of girls. I never wanted to meet anyone. I always wanted to hide behind the phone and text.

A couple of months later I started hating it and regretting after every session. Yet, I couldn't stop.

Am I totally free? I don't know 😕

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RUN 🏃‍♂️ for your dear life

No self esteem. No confidence. No ambition. Just dreams.

Do I wake up everyday with lots of energy? No but that's because I have a health problem, which is a story for another day.

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The harder I tried, the worse it became. I could get angry with myself and go about 3 days without it but when I relapse, I can do 3 in a day. And the subsequent days; it's just me getting drowned in the rabbit hole.

Now I have the mental fortitude to face life's every day battles.

I secretly kept on watching and watching until I got 19. At this time, I had started feeling the urge to ejaculate as I was watching the pornography.

Can the existence of past lives be proven without the use of hypnosis or a pendulum to inquire about previous incarnations?

I remember sitting on the bed and smiling and that was when it hit me that I have successfully masturbated.

I don't know if all addictions are like this 🤔

And these were just the act and not the mental and social problems associated with addiction.

It’s been over a month since I stopped taking sertraline but why do I still feel side effects like brain zaps and anxiety mood changes? The root cause of anxiety it’s your thinking and I perfectly master that better than before so it’s hard lately.

There were times I was counting the days when I'm clean. But now I don't, because I got tired of counting and relapsing and starting all over again.

I knew something had to be done about my wasting existence because if nothing changes, then nothing changes.

I always wished they would sit inappropriately or the wind would blow up their dress so I can see things.

Do you think a lot of sociopaths' parents kill themselves for having brought such disgusting evil into the world? How much shame and disgust must they carry?

Oh, and everyday I woke up tired 😫 I never slept early too. My mental health was nothing to write home about.

Read that again ☝️

I knew about masturbation but I didn't actually think of doing it but one day, on my bed when I was preparing to go to school I was watching pornography and something just came in mind; why don't you rob your dick with your hand?

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There were times I could go 3 months without watching p*rn or masturbating but somehow I always came back to it.

So all I had to do was to find a way to trick my dirty brain to think that p*rn isn't nice.

Around age 9 I discovered pornography through my uncle, he had left the CD in the video player in the night after enjoying himself.

Do you think some men have sex with prostitutes because they're too afraid to talk to women? Money does the talking for them.

And I can also talk to them now.

But for me, I would say RUN away from it

I didn't even start counting the days because I didn't really believe I would get this far.

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I went there early in the morning trying to watch a movie and I found the CD inside the video player so I decided to watch what was on it and that was the beginning of the life I never wanted.

I got tired of always breaking the promises I made to myself.

I saw every girl or woman as a sex object including kid girls. There was no way I would look at a woman and not think of f*cking her.

How do you get a teenage boy to care about hygiene?

And I DID IT EVERYDAY

I did it while watching my sister. I did it while touching my sister 😭 I did it while watching my landlord's daughter.

Now how do you quit your addiction?

What are the psychological reasons behind an extreme obsession with another human being?

I just finished watching the best of the best p*rn videos on the planet. Now there's nothing else to look for on p*rn sites again.

It took me days to finish watching them. Finally I decided to go to the washroom to do The Last Fap.

I know some people masturbate and they don't have the problems I went through.

Can you explain the ongoing conflict between Palestine and Israel? Why does it appear that Israel has been more successful in the conflict?

But how was I going to do it when everything I knew wasn't working? I didn't know

Now I know I have all the nice videos on my phone, the rest I don't have, are not nice. So I had to start watching them one after the other. Some of them were even 2 hours long but I made sure I watched every little bit of it.

Is masturbation and p*rn bad?

This was February 2019.

Just keep trying

So I'm still hanging on this lie.

It didn't feel great after ejaculating but hey, who cares about feelings?

I remember I once did it in my classroom at dawn. I did it in the hospital's washrooms. I did it in the lab where I work; both daytime and midnight.

So I thought had unlocked a new potential in life. I was doing it even if I don't feel the urge. I forced the urge to come by watching pornography.

I went on my favourite site and started scrolling through my favourite categories; petite girls, sleeping girls, Japanese girls, Japanese mom, Japanese wife, massage, forced, in the bus, gangb*ng, Muslim girls, ebony, student and teacher, in the classroom, curvy, African, etc

Have I stopped seeing girls as sex objects? Not entirely, I still want to f*ck some of them.

I did it in my administrator's office.

I did it in my room. I did it in my washroom. I did it in school in the washrooms.

Remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

I started rubbing it and I liked how I was feeling so I kept on doing it faster and EUREKA, sperms came out of my dick.

Now I don't wait to be talked to before I respond. I talk when I think I'm supposed to.

All I knew was that, I couldn't masturbate without p*rn. I was first getting the urge to watch p*rn, while watching, I would now feel like masturbating.

Was quitting worth the effort? At least for my mental health, it's a billion times worth it.

I made sure I downloaded every video that was nice for me. This took almost the whole day.